After almost a week to reflect, I'm still trying to process all the experiences from the Lion and Lamb Festival last weekend. As both a part of the planning team and a participant, I've been thinking about it from both of those sides. Both of those views have a different focus and generate different trains of thought. For the sake of clarity, I'll focus on the participant side in this post and address the planning team side in my next. If you're reading this and maybe aren't so fond of Christianity and/or the Church, do me a favor and read it through to the end. It rambles at times, but I promise it goes somewhere. And maybe that somewhere speaks to you like it does to me...
***
As an introvert, I know myself enough to know that I need a few days to sift through all my thoughts and experiences after events like this. Two very full days (though I was there about 4.5) of working, talking, moving, worshiping, praying, thinking, resting, worshiping together. The constant interactions with people are a blessing, but in order for me to get anything lasting out of them, I need time afterward to process the experience. So I have spent my down time this week thinking things through. Trying to cement memories and moments in my mind to draw on in days to come.
One of the beautiful things about events like this where people gather to wrestle with common ideas, issues, and interests is the ease of a common bond. I had the chance to talk, pray, worship, work, and fellowship with others who wanted to wrestle with questions of peace, justice, love, hope, etc. It was an incredible experience and one I can't wait to being working on again very soon. I hope that Lion and Lamb 2014 is even better than the 2013 version. I want us to continue to invite others to join us as we engage this issues and work to build the Kingdom of God around us, to work on the future of the Church. While I don't know if everyone who attended knew just what they were getting into by so doing, I feel like it's a pretty safe assumption to say that everyone at least had some interest in the Church and where it is going.
That's been a big question on my mind for some time.
A brief survey of the church world would probably show you the following trends: congregations are generally shrinking, fewer people attend a church regularly or would even call themselves a Christian, the ones in the pews are getting older, public perception and opinion of Christianity is, shall we say, less than stellar. Before anyone gets all worked up, these are general trends, and there are always exceptions. there are plenty of churches growing, people growing in their faith, and people who see the Church as a powerful force for good and change in this world.
Those "exceptions" are truly what interest me. I'm tired of the constant negativity. I'm tired of dwelling on what we don't have instead of embracing and utilizing what we do. I'm tired of hearing about the impending death of the church. Ain't nobody got time for that.
You see, God is at work doing a new thing...
Sunday, September 08, 2013
Monday, September 02, 2013
Your Kingdom Come
Sitting at home now after a long, exhausting, and incredible weekend, I find myself trying to concisely put into words my reflections on the first Lion and Lamb Festival. I want to capture some immediate thoughts before they slip away into the day-to-day routine of "normal" life. This isn't by any means an exhaustive list, but in my current state of exhaustion, it will do for now. I'll think and process over the week and add a more substantial response this weekend.
Here are five initial things that I want to share:
1) Hope Still Flies
I'm physically and mentally tired, but at the same time, I'm so incredibly motivated/excited/pumped about the future of the Church. Like many others, I have concerns about the current state of the Church, how we have failed to live out our calling, how we have harmed so many, how we have failed so many. But in light of this weekend, I feel a new day dawning. No, we did not solve all the problems of the world this weekend (give us a couple more days though...), but I do know that we have a great and powerful hope. Hearing all the speakers, artists, vendors, participants, volunteers engage issues of peace, justice, love, theology, mission, etc. reminded me once again that what is is not what has to be. To quote Five Iron Frenzy, hope still flies. I needed that reminder.
2) Keeping It Real
It's awesome to meet people you have observed from afar and find out that they are even more awesome in person. My main responsibility over the weekend was to be the host/chauffeur for many of our speakers and artists who came from all over the country. It was amazing, because that meant that for the length of our trip, I had chance to pick their brains in a confined setting. Getting to know brilliant folks like Erica Granados De La Rosa, Bruce Reyes-Chow, Richard Kentopp and Rachel Held Evans was a huge blessing to me. There were many other very interesting and fantastic folks as well but I had the most time with these four people. If you don't know about them, I highly encourage you to check them out and revel in their brilliance.
3) Fast Friends
I think I had the most one-on-one time with Rachel, and I just want to say that the Rachel you read on her blog is the same one you meet in person. She was a delight to get to know, and I think she and my wife might have been separated at birth. She's so genuinely nice and willing to share her journey with folks. Whether we were talking about the big important issues of life or the newest episode of Breaking Bad that we were both missing over the weekend, I felt like I've known her for years. She's so easy to talk to and she has a true gift for communication. She might tell you she's just a writer who maybe begrudgingly got into speaking, but I think she's selling herself short. She does a fantastic job of telling her story and experience and inviting others to both share in hers and express their own. She is a true woman of valor.
4) The Power Of Community
One of the coolest things I saw was the ongoing development of a community. One of the most important, maybe THE most important, things we wanted to do with this festival was to gather a community of people who were wrestling with the same questions, issues of how the Church should speak for justice, work for peace, inspire hope and share love in the world today. The "voice" of the Church has as of late been dominated by ideas that, in my opinion, do not match up with how I read the message of Jesus Christ. I feel like the people gathered there were asking those same questions and trying to figure out how we can live out what we believe in the midst of perhaps louder voices of so many varieties, as well as how we can listen to what those voices are saying in an open and inviting manner. I've written before how the life we lead can be isolating and frustrating. This weekend was a beautiful and powerful reminder that I am not alone in this. I am not the only one who gets frustrated. I am not the only one who wants something more. I am not the only one who doesn't know where to start, and feels like I am but one drop in a vast ocean. The power of community has a multiplying effect, and that was certainly evident this weekend.
5) Giving Birth Is Hard
Having never been a part of creating something like this, I am honestly just a bit relieved to have one under our belt as a team and so pleased to see it go so well. Most of our team had never done something like this. We were newborn foals, learning how to walk but needing to run due to a tight time-table. This event was conceived, planned, prepped and executed in less than 10 months. Basically, we gave birth to the event in just a bit longer than it takes to birth a child. And like I imagine most parents of a newborn feel, I am totally proud of our baby. It is a beautiful emblem of hope, full of promise and potential. I cannot wait to watch it grow.
***
This weekend was a brick laid toward building the Kingdom of God. One brick doesn't seem like much when you're building a city, but one brick joins another. And another. And another. Foundations take shape. Pieces take form. Buildings are built. It does not happen over night.
But it does not happen if we do not place our brick.
And so we work.
May Your Kingdom come.
Peace...
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Feeling Creative
I feel like I want to create something. It started months ago (with the post about writing on writing) with a desire to write. Since then it has reformed? Reshaped? Reconfigured? It has become a need to create something.
Millions of avenues.
No direction.
Just a desire to make something. To build something from nothing.
I kind of want to write a comic book.
Or make a movie.
Or start a podcast.
Or really learn to play an instrument.
Or write consistently on this blog or another blog.
Or build something.
It is basically an unfocused desire to take thoughts and ideas and do something creative and constructive with them. I just need to figure out what to do.
For pretty much as long as I can remember, I have felt like I've been moderately good at many things, but great at absolutely nothing. A jack of all trades, master of none sort of situation. What's my thing? What's that one thing that, when people think of me, they think I'm really great at it?
I have no clue.
Maybe this desire to create something is really just a desire to figure out that thing at which I have the potential to be great? Start something new and maybe, just maybe, I'll be really good at it. Or at least realize the potential to be really great at it. Obviously, I don't expect to just take up something new and be awesome at it. But it would be nice to figure out what in the world I have some real talent for, and find a way to put it to work creatively.
The most recent thing has been considering starting a podcast. It's relatively cheap to start, it is seemingly easy to do, and open to a variety of avenues. I've been listening to a lot of Kevin Smith podcasts for a while now, and he seems to love just sitting down with folks and talking. That seems to be the thing that drives him the most. I can see the appeal. The appeal of sitting down with friends and strangers and delving deep into a subject and plumbing the depths to see what one can find.
The issue is figuring out what focus to take. Do I make it faith/church/theology centric? Or indulge my love of gaming/nerddom/film/music/comics? Do I make it about people and their stories? Or about people's passions and vocations and how they intersect?
What's the hook?
What would people enjoy listening to and engaging?
What would I like to listen to? Getting back to Kevin Smith, he often goes on these rants about people chasing whimsy and doing something for the love of simply doing it, chasing a passion or an idea and making something happen.
So I'm trying to figure out where to channel this creative energy into something creative and productive.
Any ideas?
Peace...
Millions of avenues.
No direction.
Just a desire to make something. To build something from nothing.
I kind of want to write a comic book.
Or make a movie.
Or start a podcast.
Or really learn to play an instrument.
Or write consistently on this blog or another blog.
Or build something.
It is basically an unfocused desire to take thoughts and ideas and do something creative and constructive with them. I just need to figure out what to do.
For pretty much as long as I can remember, I have felt like I've been moderately good at many things, but great at absolutely nothing. A jack of all trades, master of none sort of situation. What's my thing? What's that one thing that, when people think of me, they think I'm really great at it?
I have no clue.
Maybe this desire to create something is really just a desire to figure out that thing at which I have the potential to be great? Start something new and maybe, just maybe, I'll be really good at it. Or at least realize the potential to be really great at it. Obviously, I don't expect to just take up something new and be awesome at it. But it would be nice to figure out what in the world I have some real talent for, and find a way to put it to work creatively.
The most recent thing has been considering starting a podcast. It's relatively cheap to start, it is seemingly easy to do, and open to a variety of avenues. I've been listening to a lot of Kevin Smith podcasts for a while now, and he seems to love just sitting down with folks and talking. That seems to be the thing that drives him the most. I can see the appeal. The appeal of sitting down with friends and strangers and delving deep into a subject and plumbing the depths to see what one can find.
The issue is figuring out what focus to take. Do I make it faith/church/theology centric? Or indulge my love of gaming/nerddom/film/music/comics? Do I make it about people and their stories? Or about people's passions and vocations and how they intersect?
What's the hook?
What would people enjoy listening to and engaging?
What would I like to listen to? Getting back to Kevin Smith, he often goes on these rants about people chasing whimsy and doing something for the love of simply doing it, chasing a passion or an idea and making something happen.
So I'm trying to figure out where to channel this creative energy into something creative and productive.
Any ideas?
Peace...
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Hope Still Flies...
It's 6:00am on a Saturday, the one day a week now where I can really sleep in. And I'm wide awake, my mind racing from a weird dream, the substance of which compels me out of bed to process it. I'm one of those (unfortunate?) people who, once my eyes are opened, cannot get back to sleep, regardless of the time at which said eyes open. I'm generally a morning person. If I could get by without sleeping, I often think how much more productive I could be, an extra 7-8 hours a day to do with what I may.
I fought this compulsion to get up as best I could, but eventually I had to cave. I can't really explain it, but I felt like I had no choice but to get up and think about what I had dreamed. To chew on it. To break it apart for meaning, this strange amalgamation of vision and words and experiences. The details themselves are of little interest (I've already forgotten some of them) but safe to say the overarching idea was about closing the door on the last 9 months.
The last 9 months were, safe to say, generally terrible. A soul crushing search for gainful employment, coupled with a move to the middle of nowhere. Car trouble. Family struggles. Wondering if I should go back to school. Examining my vocation. Each assurance that "God has a plan for you" or "It will all work out in God's time" another stab in the heart. Rough times, in all. A life uprooted and tumbled, spilled over and poured out. It was probably the toughest consecutive 9 month stretch I've endured in a long time, if not in the entirety of my 30 years so far. I've done enough whining and venting and ranting about it to fill a novel, so I will leave it at that.
But this dream.
Man, this dream...Whatever it meant, whatever my subconscious was working through..
It felt like hope.
And I was beginning to wonder when I might feel that again.
But it is surging through me right now, and I don't remember the last time I felt this good. I know in large part it is because I now have a job, and one I believe is going to be incredibly fulfilling (though filled with more spreadsheets than I imagined a fulfilling job might) and rewarding and a way to do a LOT of good. But it's more than that.
Something's going on.
I don't know where it goes or what it looks like, but something is at work now that was lying dormant over the last few months. Maybe some grand adventure starts now. Maybe some next step in figuring out who I am. Maybe I just had a confluence of properly timed synapse firings. Whatever it is, I am interested to see where it goes.
Fittingly, as the dream drew to a close and I felt myself awaken, I began to hear (feel? imagine?) the lines from Five Iron Frenzy's "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night." For those of you unfamiliar, below are the lyrics to the song, followed by a link to listen to it. Since waking up around 6 am, I have listened to it probably 25 times.
I can't imagine a more perfect way to wake up, and know that hope still flies.
Hope still flies...
"It was a dark and stormy night last night.
Bitter dark.
Rain fell in torrents, stabbing it’s ghosts through the cold,
And straight through our hearts.
I've been waiting, in halfhearted sleep,
For a promise I half meant to keep.
Just for hoping that hope still flies,
Wipe the sleep out of our sleeping eyes.
Fog that is lifting,
The spectre of dreams we once had,
Speaks into the night,
Slumber is over, sunlight is streaming through,
Come into the light.
I've been waiting, in halfhearted sleep,
For a promise I half meant to keep.
Just for hoping that hope still flies,
To wipe the sleep out of our sleeping eyes.
I know,
Hope has not forgotten me,
I know,
I’m waking from the longest dream.
I know,
I know,
I know,
I know...
I've been waiting, in halfhearted sleep,
For a promise I half meant to keep.
Just for hoping that hope still flies,
Wipe the sleep out of our sleeping eyes.
And hope still flies
And hope still flies
And hope still flies..."
I fought this compulsion to get up as best I could, but eventually I had to cave. I can't really explain it, but I felt like I had no choice but to get up and think about what I had dreamed. To chew on it. To break it apart for meaning, this strange amalgamation of vision and words and experiences. The details themselves are of little interest (I've already forgotten some of them) but safe to say the overarching idea was about closing the door on the last 9 months.
The last 9 months were, safe to say, generally terrible. A soul crushing search for gainful employment, coupled with a move to the middle of nowhere. Car trouble. Family struggles. Wondering if I should go back to school. Examining my vocation. Each assurance that "God has a plan for you" or "It will all work out in God's time" another stab in the heart. Rough times, in all. A life uprooted and tumbled, spilled over and poured out. It was probably the toughest consecutive 9 month stretch I've endured in a long time, if not in the entirety of my 30 years so far. I've done enough whining and venting and ranting about it to fill a novel, so I will leave it at that.
But this dream.
Man, this dream...Whatever it meant, whatever my subconscious was working through..
It felt like hope.
And I was beginning to wonder when I might feel that again.
But it is surging through me right now, and I don't remember the last time I felt this good. I know in large part it is because I now have a job, and one I believe is going to be incredibly fulfilling (though filled with more spreadsheets than I imagined a fulfilling job might) and rewarding and a way to do a LOT of good. But it's more than that.
Something's going on.
I don't know where it goes or what it looks like, but something is at work now that was lying dormant over the last few months. Maybe some grand adventure starts now. Maybe some next step in figuring out who I am. Maybe I just had a confluence of properly timed synapse firings. Whatever it is, I am interested to see where it goes.
Fittingly, as the dream drew to a close and I felt myself awaken, I began to hear (feel? imagine?) the lines from Five Iron Frenzy's "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night." For those of you unfamiliar, below are the lyrics to the song, followed by a link to listen to it. Since waking up around 6 am, I have listened to it probably 25 times.
I can't imagine a more perfect way to wake up, and know that hope still flies.
Hope still flies...
"It was a dark and stormy night last night.
Bitter dark.
Rain fell in torrents, stabbing it’s ghosts through the cold,
And straight through our hearts.
I've been waiting, in halfhearted sleep,
For a promise I half meant to keep.
Just for hoping that hope still flies,
Wipe the sleep out of our sleeping eyes.
Fog that is lifting,
The spectre of dreams we once had,
Speaks into the night,
Slumber is over, sunlight is streaming through,
Come into the light.
I've been waiting, in halfhearted sleep,
For a promise I half meant to keep.
Just for hoping that hope still flies,
To wipe the sleep out of our sleeping eyes.
I know,
Hope has not forgotten me,
I know,
I’m waking from the longest dream.
I know,
I know,
I know,
I know...
I've been waiting, in halfhearted sleep,
For a promise I half meant to keep.
Just for hoping that hope still flies,
Wipe the sleep out of our sleeping eyes.
And hope still flies
And hope still flies
And hope still flies..."
Achievement Unlocked: Obtain Gainful Employment
Finally. After a long, difficult, soul-wrenching search, I have a job.
Last week Jill and I were with her family in California, having a family vacation. Of course, when you're unemployed, every day is a vacation. But not every day is spent in southern California, and least not for me. Anyway, I had been in contact with this prospective employer for a few months, moving from introductory meeting to interview to another interview, etc. The normal employer-employee courting process.
I was hoping to hear from them before leaving for California. And obviously I was hoping the news was positive. Had it been negative, I may have just stayed in California (side note: I don't know if you guys have heard, but California is pretty freakin' awesome.). But no news before we left. At this point, I suppose no news was better than bad news that may have put a dark tarnish on my mood for the week.
About half way through the week, I get an email entitled "Let's talk about the position." Crap. Ominous. Foreboding.
Turns out my suspicions were incorrect. It was actually, "hey let's talk about this position because we want to offer it to you."
And so, I am beyond incredibly pleased to announce that two days after returning from vacation, I began working for the Community Foundation of Morgan County, as their Program Officer. What does that mean? What does a Program Officer do? Well, I've been on the job for a grand total of 5 days so far, but I think a fair summary would be to say that I work with the Foundation to help administer their scholarship and grant programs. The Foundation has many different funds that it manages that are designed to provide grants and scholarships for students and groups in Morgan County. Simply put, I get to help students go to college, breaking cycles of poverty, increasing their education and future prospects. I get to help local non-profits reach out to the community to provide a wide range of incredibly important services. I get to be part of an organization that makes a tremendous difference in our area, and I am incredibly honored to be a part of it.
You can check out our website at http://cfmconline.org/ to learn more!
A huge thank you to everyone who helped Jill and I during these last few difficult months by way of prayer, support, networking, putting me in contact with people who might be able to help, prayer, food, pats on the back and such. I appreciate everyone who listened to me rage against the machine, who didn't give me cop out platitudes, but instead commiserated with me and provided their ministry of presence, even when they didn't know they were doing so.
Thanks. Many times over.
Last week Jill and I were with her family in California, having a family vacation. Of course, when you're unemployed, every day is a vacation. But not every day is spent in southern California, and least not for me. Anyway, I had been in contact with this prospective employer for a few months, moving from introductory meeting to interview to another interview, etc. The normal employer-employee courting process.
I was hoping to hear from them before leaving for California. And obviously I was hoping the news was positive. Had it been negative, I may have just stayed in California (side note: I don't know if you guys have heard, but California is pretty freakin' awesome.). But no news before we left. At this point, I suppose no news was better than bad news that may have put a dark tarnish on my mood for the week.
About half way through the week, I get an email entitled "Let's talk about the position." Crap. Ominous. Foreboding.
Turns out my suspicions were incorrect. It was actually, "hey let's talk about this position because we want to offer it to you."
And so, I am beyond incredibly pleased to announce that two days after returning from vacation, I began working for the Community Foundation of Morgan County, as their Program Officer. What does that mean? What does a Program Officer do? Well, I've been on the job for a grand total of 5 days so far, but I think a fair summary would be to say that I work with the Foundation to help administer their scholarship and grant programs. The Foundation has many different funds that it manages that are designed to provide grants and scholarships for students and groups in Morgan County. Simply put, I get to help students go to college, breaking cycles of poverty, increasing their education and future prospects. I get to help local non-profits reach out to the community to provide a wide range of incredibly important services. I get to be part of an organization that makes a tremendous difference in our area, and I am incredibly honored to be a part of it.
You can check out our website at http://cfmconline.org/ to learn more!
A huge thank you to everyone who helped Jill and I during these last few difficult months by way of prayer, support, networking, putting me in contact with people who might be able to help, prayer, food, pats on the back and such. I appreciate everyone who listened to me rage against the machine, who didn't give me cop out platitudes, but instead commiserated with me and provided their ministry of presence, even when they didn't know they were doing so.
Thanks. Many times over.
Thursday, March 07, 2013
This horse is dead...
And yet the beating continues.
Still no job, though I have a couple of prospects in the works. It's the same thing every day. Get up. Eat breakfast. Hunt for jobs. Apply where appropriate, and in some cases, where only tangentially appropriate. Confirm that they received my application. Wait. Distress over how long to wait before contacting them again, seeking to find that balance between showing initiative and interest without being annoying or seemingly high maintenance. Wait some more. Get rejected.
So much rejection. More rejection than I have ever faced in my life.
It's demoralizing.
I'm a skilled, highly educated worker with 10+ years of work experience in a variety of fields (ministry, business, banking, libraries). And yet I can't seem to even get my foot in the door for an interview in most cases. I've had some interviews, even made it to the final 2 of one position (where they ended up hiring someone else from inside, so, yeah...). But mostly it has been one rejection after another.
And at this point, I don't know what else to do. Try to get a job flipping burgers? I'm not even sure they'd hire me. I'm either over qualified for something or under qualified for another.
There are a whole series of issues related to this job hunt: the United Methodist Church itinerancy process and the apparent lack of common sense associated with said process, social isolation, financial problems, family stress, having to drive 25-30 minutes to practically anything, etc.
But the issue weighing most heavily on me is this: what in the world am I doing with my life?
I don't know, most of the time. If I had a choice, I think I would most enjoy travelling the world with a group of friends having adventures and experiencing awesome things. Sadly, I don't think anyone is going to pay me for that, so I'm left trying to find other gainful employment that I find fulfilling. Which, for me, means that it has to have some sort of positive impact on the world. I want to be a part of something bigger than myself. Some way, some small way, where I can make this world a better place. It's just part of who I am. Part of my faith that, as a follower of Christ, it is incumbent upon me to help, to serve, to make this world more like the Kingdom.
Finding that balance between paying the bills and making a difference is a challenge. And at this point, I am just so frustrated at the 9+ months of spinning my wheels and getting nowhere. As soon as we found out where we were moving, I started looking for job prospects. And I'm still in the exact same spot.
You can make a human being in 9 months. My last 9 months have given birth to nothing but frustration, demoralization and an intense wrestling over my self worth. I know without a doubt that I can be a worthwhile addition to a non-profit or college. But at this point they don't yet seem to agree. So am I just way off base in my self-evaluation? Am I doing something wrong in the application process? Is it really impossible to change your career field (and if so, someone please let college students know before they leave)?
I wake up each day wondering if this will be the day that a job offer comes through. If I'm employable. If things are going to get better. If we will ever truly adjust to living in the middle of nowhere with no friends in the area.
If there's a point to any of the last 9+ months.
And that's really hard.
Tuesday, December 04, 2012
Writing on writing
I'm writing about writing. Things are getting a mite meta in here. If someone comments on this post, writing about my writing on writing, we may create some sort of meta-singularity...
I mentioned in my last post that over the last few months I've felt an urge/inspiration to write (which I, in typical form, found a way to ignore and forget and cold shoulder until it dissipated). For a long time, I've had this little nagging desire to write something. To create. To build something of substance out of nothing but ideas and words. This desire was initially sparked by my incredible high school English teacher, Mrs. Smith, the first person I can recall ever encouraging me to write and telling me I had any talent or skill for the task.
For the longest time, I've wanted to write something, likely a novel, but I can never come up with an idea big enough upon which to build said novel. I stumble upon little nuggets of ideas-scenes or phrases or lines of dialogue, but I'm still working on uncovering the heart of this imagined novel, the critical mass that I can develop into a complete work. Spoiler alert- In all likelihood, there will be zombies.
Throughout college and seminary the spark to write was there, but it was constantly drenched by a flood of papers and tests and classes and studying. I loved my field of study, but it was definitely writing-centric, leaving little free time or motivation to do so for fun. After putting together a 15 page paper, finishing just under the deadline, the last thing I wanted to do was sit down to churn out more words on pages. Now that I've been out of school for more than 4 years, I've certainly had the time to write, and even more so over the last 4+ months, but I don't have the motivation that I used to.
What happened to that urge to write?
Where did it go?
I have no clue.
So, in the interest of trying to find it, I'm trying to be more intentional about forcing myself to write. Just write. Sitting down and blogging, or adding to a couple of things I have in the works, writing song lyrics, or grabbing a pen and putting whatever inane thought comes to mind down on paper. Just doing anything to get stuff from my mind out into something tangible/visible. Maybe that act of discipline will kick start the muse I silenced.
I mentioned in my last post that over the last few months I've felt an urge/inspiration to write (which I, in typical form, found a way to ignore and forget and cold shoulder until it dissipated). For a long time, I've had this little nagging desire to write something. To create. To build something of substance out of nothing but ideas and words. This desire was initially sparked by my incredible high school English teacher, Mrs. Smith, the first person I can recall ever encouraging me to write and telling me I had any talent or skill for the task.
For the longest time, I've wanted to write something, likely a novel, but I can never come up with an idea big enough upon which to build said novel. I stumble upon little nuggets of ideas-scenes or phrases or lines of dialogue, but I'm still working on uncovering the heart of this imagined novel, the critical mass that I can develop into a complete work. Spoiler alert- In all likelihood, there will be zombies.
Throughout college and seminary the spark to write was there, but it was constantly drenched by a flood of papers and tests and classes and studying. I loved my field of study, but it was definitely writing-centric, leaving little free time or motivation to do so for fun. After putting together a 15 page paper, finishing just under the deadline, the last thing I wanted to do was sit down to churn out more words on pages. Now that I've been out of school for more than 4 years, I've certainly had the time to write, and even more so over the last 4+ months, but I don't have the motivation that I used to.
What happened to that urge to write?
Where did it go?
I have no clue.
So, in the interest of trying to find it, I'm trying to be more intentional about forcing myself to write. Just write. Sitting down and blogging, or adding to a couple of things I have in the works, writing song lyrics, or grabbing a pen and putting whatever inane thought comes to mind down on paper. Just doing anything to get stuff from my mind out into something tangible/visible. Maybe that act of discipline will kick start the muse I silenced.
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
A list of stuff that has happened.
Since my last post...
Found out we were moving.
Started job hunting.
Moved.
Applied for numerous (read roughly 30+) jobs.
Was unsuccessful at achieving sustainable employment.
Video gamed. A lot.
Considered becoming a writer.
Lost brief motivation at becoming a writer.
Regained motivation for becoming a writer. Work in progess.
Presided over first wedding.
Bridge Day (highlight of last 6 months).
Rethought (and rethinking) entire vocation/calling/career path.
Began to investigate further educational options.
Moped (As in "moped around the house," not "rode on a moped").
Raged against the machine.
At this point, I don't know where things are headed, but prospects are slim. Look for more posting to commence, as I clearly have nothing else going on.
(Not at) Peace...
Found out we were moving.
Started job hunting.
Moved.
Applied for numerous (read roughly 30+) jobs.
Was unsuccessful at achieving sustainable employment.
Video gamed. A lot.
Considered becoming a writer.
Lost brief motivation at becoming a writer.
Regained motivation for becoming a writer. Work in progess.
Presided over first wedding.
Bridge Day (highlight of last 6 months).
Rethought (and rethinking) entire vocation/calling/career path.
Began to investigate further educational options.
Moped (As in "moped around the house," not "rode on a moped").
Raged against the machine.
At this point, I don't know where things are headed, but prospects are slim. Look for more posting to commence, as I clearly have nothing else going on.
(Not at) Peace...
Thursday, February 16, 2012
One of the best gifts I've ever received...
In case you live under a rock and missed it, Valentine's Day was two days ago. Aside from being a commercial monstrosity of a holiday, it is a day to celebrate love in all its many forms. Traditionally, gifts are exchanged, flowers given, candy bought, etc. Normally guys that are not idiots are giving these gifts to their significant others. As a non-idiot, I had gifts for Jill, and since Tuesdays are the one day a week we have off together, we were fortunate enough to spend the entire day together, so we went out for a lunch date and a movie.
Surprisingly, Jill had a gift for me. And it was one of the coolest gifts I've ever received. She gave me a box, decorated with a few pictures of us, and filled with little slips of paper. Upon each slip was written something that she loved about me (or our relationship together). Simple, sincere and wonderful. For those of you who know Jill, you know that she is not the most sentimental person ever (and I say that only because it amplifies the expression the meaning of this present), but this was truly a gift given with great thought, care and love. Incredibly heartwarming.
I've decided to read one slip a day. The first one was about our shared loved of soft pretzels, which are ridiculously delicious. Yesterday's was about how I let Jill have the remote [This isn't out of magnanimity on my part- Jill simply won't watch most of the stuff I like, so if we're going to watch TV together, it's usually something that makes me want to punch myself in the eye (love you, dear!)].
Today's was about how much she loves my hope for a better world.
After two rather light-hearted things, this one hit me powerfully. I do love soft pretzels, and I do generally let her control the remote, but the fact that I do hope for a better world is kind of at the core of who I, on my best days, consider myself to be. And I really want to thank her for reminding me of this fact.
I don't get overly "religious" on this blog often. For those of you who might read this blog regularly but don't care for Christians/Christianity (because you're tired of obnoxious Bible-thumpers who want to shove it down your throat, or because you find it irrelevant or illogical or just simply something you can't buy into), I hope you won't skip out now, because I think what I'm about to say might still resonate with you.
I do hope for a better world. Hope is a powerful thing. It is central to how I understand Christianity, and my role as a follower of Jesus. Anyone can look around today and see that things are broken, skewed, screwed up; choose your word of choice here. Our situation is untenable long term. We have people starving to death while billionaires wipe their butts with hundred dollar bills. We have religious leaders building cults based on fear, guilt, hate. We have politicians bought and paid for by corporations. Our society has become so fractured and argumentative that we can't even talk to each other constructively. We cannot disagree civilly, in any arena. Instead we yell platitudes at each other, talking points (or even scripture passages?) lobbed back and forth at increasingly louder volumes in an attempt to destroy the other. We have corrupt political systems, destructive economic systems, and manipulative religious systems (including many versions of Christianity, admittedly).
This is broken.
This is foolish.
This is demoralizing.
But this is not the end.
What is is not what has to be. We don't have to live like this. We don't have to live in a broken system. I don't claim to have all the answers, a plan to solve all of this. I know better than that. But I know that we have the capacity for change. We have the ability to fix this. My understanding of how to fix it is drawn in large part from the teaching and example of Jesus, but I'm guessing that the staunchest atheist one might meet could arrive at similar conclusions without drawing from the same wisdom.
It starts with hope.
Hope for something better. For a world where there is enough for everyone's needs. Where people have fresh water, food in their stomachs, roofs over their heads. Where people are valued for their unique gifts, personalities, passions. Where we can actually stand to be in the same room with people with whom we disagree. Where people from diverse backgrounds, races, political parties can coexist. Where people can feel whole and loved.
I don't know about you, but that starts to sound a little like the Kingdom about which Jesus spoke. The Kingdom he prayed to see here on earth. The Kingdom.
One of my favorite bands of all time, Five Iron Frenzy, has recently decided to get back together, and they released a song called "It Was A Dark And Stormy Night." Part of the song says "I've been waiting, in halfhearted sleep, for a promise I half meant to keep. Just for hoping that hope still flies, wipe the sleep out of our sleeping eyes. And hope still flies.."
I'm hoping that we will wake from our halfhearted sleep. That we will wake and see that there is hope for something brighter, something better.What is is not what has to be.
I hope.
Grace and Peace...
PS: If you want to hear more Five Iron or learn more about the band, as well as download "It Was A Dark And Stormy Night" for free, check out Five Iron Frenzy.
Surprisingly, Jill had a gift for me. And it was one of the coolest gifts I've ever received. She gave me a box, decorated with a few pictures of us, and filled with little slips of paper. Upon each slip was written something that she loved about me (or our relationship together). Simple, sincere and wonderful. For those of you who know Jill, you know that she is not the most sentimental person ever (and I say that only because it amplifies the expression the meaning of this present), but this was truly a gift given with great thought, care and love. Incredibly heartwarming.
I've decided to read one slip a day. The first one was about our shared loved of soft pretzels, which are ridiculously delicious. Yesterday's was about how I let Jill have the remote [This isn't out of magnanimity on my part- Jill simply won't watch most of the stuff I like, so if we're going to watch TV together, it's usually something that makes me want to punch myself in the eye (love you, dear!)].
Today's was about how much she loves my hope for a better world.
After two rather light-hearted things, this one hit me powerfully. I do love soft pretzels, and I do generally let her control the remote, but the fact that I do hope for a better world is kind of at the core of who I, on my best days, consider myself to be. And I really want to thank her for reminding me of this fact.
I don't get overly "religious" on this blog often. For those of you who might read this blog regularly but don't care for Christians/Christianity (because you're tired of obnoxious Bible-thumpers who want to shove it down your throat, or because you find it irrelevant or illogical or just simply something you can't buy into), I hope you won't skip out now, because I think what I'm about to say might still resonate with you.
I do hope for a better world. Hope is a powerful thing. It is central to how I understand Christianity, and my role as a follower of Jesus. Anyone can look around today and see that things are broken, skewed, screwed up; choose your word of choice here. Our situation is untenable long term. We have people starving to death while billionaires wipe their butts with hundred dollar bills. We have religious leaders building cults based on fear, guilt, hate. We have politicians bought and paid for by corporations. Our society has become so fractured and argumentative that we can't even talk to each other constructively. We cannot disagree civilly, in any arena. Instead we yell platitudes at each other, talking points (or even scripture passages?) lobbed back and forth at increasingly louder volumes in an attempt to destroy the other. We have corrupt political systems, destructive economic systems, and manipulative religious systems (including many versions of Christianity, admittedly).
This is broken.
This is foolish.
This is demoralizing.
But this is not the end.
What is is not what has to be. We don't have to live like this. We don't have to live in a broken system. I don't claim to have all the answers, a plan to solve all of this. I know better than that. But I know that we have the capacity for change. We have the ability to fix this. My understanding of how to fix it is drawn in large part from the teaching and example of Jesus, but I'm guessing that the staunchest atheist one might meet could arrive at similar conclusions without drawing from the same wisdom.
It starts with hope.
Hope for something better. For a world where there is enough for everyone's needs. Where people have fresh water, food in their stomachs, roofs over their heads. Where people are valued for their unique gifts, personalities, passions. Where we can actually stand to be in the same room with people with whom we disagree. Where people from diverse backgrounds, races, political parties can coexist. Where people can feel whole and loved.
I don't know about you, but that starts to sound a little like the Kingdom about which Jesus spoke. The Kingdom he prayed to see here on earth. The Kingdom.
One of my favorite bands of all time, Five Iron Frenzy, has recently decided to get back together, and they released a song called "It Was A Dark And Stormy Night." Part of the song says "I've been waiting, in halfhearted sleep, for a promise I half meant to keep. Just for hoping that hope still flies, wipe the sleep out of our sleeping eyes. And hope still flies.."
I'm hoping that we will wake from our halfhearted sleep. That we will wake and see that there is hope for something brighter, something better.What is is not what has to be.
I hope.
Grace and Peace...
PS: If you want to hear more Five Iron or learn more about the band, as well as download "It Was A Dark And Stormy Night" for free, check out Five Iron Frenzy.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Cover Songs I Want To Hear
At work today I was listening to lots of cover songs via Spotify. It got me thinking of covers I would like to see. There is an art form to a good cover. The best covers reinterpret a song in an entirely new way, bringing something new to a song, giving it a new life without destroying the song in the process. I have a special affinity for cross-genre covers.
Possibly my favorite cover is Mat Weddle (of the band Obadiah Parker)'s cover of Outkast's "Hey Ya." Google it if you've never heard it. The original song has a lot of heart to it that can get lost in the original. Weddle manages to pull the emotional center of that song into the light with his "guy and a guitar" sound. Pretty impressive.
I've been thinking of other covers that I want to hear.
Bluegrass covers:
Muse - "Knights of Cydonia"
Daft Punk - "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger"
Another one that could be fun: country cover of LMFAO's "Party Rock Anthem"
Possibly my favorite cover is Mat Weddle (of the band Obadiah Parker)'s cover of Outkast's "Hey Ya." Google it if you've never heard it. The original song has a lot of heart to it that can get lost in the original. Weddle manages to pull the emotional center of that song into the light with his "guy and a guitar" sound. Pretty impressive.
I've been thinking of other covers that I want to hear.
Bluegrass covers:
Muse - "Knights of Cydonia"
Daft Punk - "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger"
Another one that could be fun: country cover of LMFAO's "Party Rock Anthem"
Monday, August 08, 2011
My wife is amazing.
She's a rock star, and she just finished up a local community theater production of an original play based on the story of the Prodigal Son, where she was the female lead. Here's a picture of her in action:
She did an incredible job and I just wanted to brag. She was truly awesome in her role, and that's even removing as much bias as I can. She's all sad now, since the show wrapped up yesterday. I always find it incredibly cool to see people doing what they love. Seeing people being completely invested and engaged in what they are doing always brings a smile to my face, even more so when it's someone I know and love.
So here's to you, dear! You rocked it.
Peace...
She did an incredible job and I just wanted to brag. She was truly awesome in her role, and that's even removing as much bias as I can. She's all sad now, since the show wrapped up yesterday. I always find it incredibly cool to see people doing what they love. Seeing people being completely invested and engaged in what they are doing always brings a smile to my face, even more so when it's someone I know and love.
So here's to you, dear! You rocked it.
Peace...
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
The Barfalounger...
Some days are better than others.
And some days, you come home, take a shower, and begin to get settled in for the evening. You sit down at the computer, check some email, play a little music.
Then you hear that sound. If you have a dog or small child, you know what I'm talking about. That sound.
And then you find yourself cleaning dog barf off your beloved recliner.
This was one of the latter.
Poor dog. He just doesn't know any better, evidently. This seems to happen every time spring rolls around. After a long winter of not having a variety of fresh, growing things to eat outside, the poor dog just has to eat anything in his sight in the back yard. Oh! A new plant. NOM. What's that, a bush? NOM. Random thing that I'm not sure what it is but looks slightly tasty? NOM. Okay, now I'm done. Let's come inside and puke on that chair I'm always sleeping on. That'll be awesome.
So I just finished cleaning up dog puke on my favorite chair. He has a skill for always puking on carpet, rug, or upholstery. Never on the easy to clean hardwood floor or tile. Nope. Always, without fail, on something which requires lots of scrubbing.
This is my life...
And some days, you come home, take a shower, and begin to get settled in for the evening. You sit down at the computer, check some email, play a little music.
Then you hear that sound. If you have a dog or small child, you know what I'm talking about. That sound.
And then you find yourself cleaning dog barf off your beloved recliner.
This was one of the latter.
Poor dog. He just doesn't know any better, evidently. This seems to happen every time spring rolls around. After a long winter of not having a variety of fresh, growing things to eat outside, the poor dog just has to eat anything in his sight in the back yard. Oh! A new plant. NOM. What's that, a bush? NOM. Random thing that I'm not sure what it is but looks slightly tasty? NOM. Okay, now I'm done. Let's come inside and puke on that chair I'm always sleeping on. That'll be awesome.
So I just finished cleaning up dog puke on my favorite chair. He has a skill for always puking on carpet, rug, or upholstery. Never on the easy to clean hardwood floor or tile. Nope. Always, without fail, on something which requires lots of scrubbing.
This is my life...
Thursday, April 07, 2011
Salute Your Jorts - Final Thoughts on the UK Basketball Season
Going into this season, if anyone had told me that UK would make the Final Four, I would have asked them what drugs they were on. A team that lost 5 draft picks from the year before and had arguably their best player sitting on the sidelines this year doesn't seem like a recipe for success. We had a team of 10 guys, 6 of whom actually played with any regularity.
And yet, here we sit in early April asking ourselves why we didn't win the National Championship after a magnificent charge to the Final Four.
Not the outcome most sane people expected. The season had highs and lows. We were awesome at home, and awesomely bad on the road. But by March, we were a pretty good team. And a late season push led us to the SEC tourney championship. On the backs of our three veterans, Miller, Liggins and Harrellson, we managed to win the SEC tourney. Then we made a HUGELY surprising NCAA tourney run, coming in as a WAY under-seeded #4 in the toughest bracket, avenging last year's loss to WVU, then toppling the best team in the country, followed up by taking out a UNC team that narrowly beat us earlier in the year, setting up a rematch with the team that gave us the worst beating of the season, UConn. By this point, expectations had shifted dramatically. This team went from one that most expected to fall by the Sweet 16 to one that most expected to win the title.
Doomed by a terrible shooting night, both from the field and from the free throw line (gee... sound familiar?), UK fell to eventual champ UConn (and destroying what would likely be the only opportunity for my team to face my wife's alma mater, Butler, and inciting unprecedented levels of trash talking in our house), crushing the Big Blue Nation's dreams of hanging banner #8 for at least another year.
This team of avengers was full of amazing stories, and this already long post doesn't have the time/patience to detail them all, but given the title, we have to point out the transformation of Joshua "Jorts" Harrellson from also-ran who almost got kicked off the team to the glass cleaning, giant slaying, throwing balls through fools' chest, heart and soul of this program.
This transformation started with twitter, of all things. After a dominating performance in the Blue White game, Jorts was looking for a pat on the back from Cal (and a well deserved pat, IMO) that never came. Instead, he was banned from twitter and sentenced to crazy amounts of conditioning.
That punishment led us to the Final Four. Dropping pounds and getting in crazy shape allowed Josh to dominate lesser men in the paint and more than hold his own against better competition. It brought us the Denim-Drive offense, seeing him take guys off the dribble and work a BEAUTIFUL pick n' roll. He went from a guy who we could count on to clean the glass to a legit scoring option.
His underdog story struck a chord in the Bluegrass, resonating with a state that is an underdog itself, especially in the sports world. Kentucky is a special place. Our passion for the Wildcats comes from many places, but I believe our devotion, pride and support comes in large part because it is really the primary thing we have of which we can be excessively proud. We LOVE our Wildcats, and the success they have found. It's a program that doesn't settle for mediocrity. We don't hang participation banners. We hang Final Four and Championship banners. We are crazy. My wife, bless her heart, is from Tennessee, and despite my best efforts to teach and explain, is still perplexed by the rabid following of the millions of UK fans.
We follow our Wildcats because they give us something in which to believe. They give us a rallying point. They give us something that we can show to the world with pride. There are many, many things wrong or depressing or weird about our state. But when it comes to sports, we have our Wildcats, the greatest tradition in all of college basketball. Take practically any measure of success, and if UK is not #1, we're in the top 5. More wins than anyone, the second most national championships, highest program winning percentage, most NCAA tourney games, most All Americans, etc. Hit up the UK basketball wikipedia entry for "The List" and prepare to be wowed.
Simply put, we have the best program. Ever. Yes, there are black marks (numerous probation/violations, scandals, etc., though there are plenty of others with similar records), but top to bottom, no program beats the University of Kentucky men's basketball team. There are some close competitors, but we are the standard bearer.
It's really the only thing Kentucky can brag about, aside from horse racing and bourbon. The Commonwealth is an underdog, and Josh's story represents someone overcoming serious roadblocks on the way to success. This team that no one expected to make the Final Four did so in large part o the back of a perfect example of what we as Kentuckians value: dedication, hard work, commitment, doing the dirty work and persevering when things go bad.
So on behalf of a grateful Big Blue Nation, I want to thank and salute Josh and this entire team for bringing home a long overdue Final Four. It is your surprising success that makes us long for the fact that we narrowly missed out on another title, and that makes it so hard to overcome the loss to UConn. But we take great pride in what you did accomplish, and so unexpectedly. And when Midnight Madness rolls around and we celebrate your success, know that you made yourselves and all of us proud.
We hang Final Four banners. And we will hang yours with glowing pride and joy.
And yet, here we sit in early April asking ourselves why we didn't win the National Championship after a magnificent charge to the Final Four.
Not the outcome most sane people expected. The season had highs and lows. We were awesome at home, and awesomely bad on the road. But by March, we were a pretty good team. And a late season push led us to the SEC tourney championship. On the backs of our three veterans, Miller, Liggins and Harrellson, we managed to win the SEC tourney. Then we made a HUGELY surprising NCAA tourney run, coming in as a WAY under-seeded #4 in the toughest bracket, avenging last year's loss to WVU, then toppling the best team in the country, followed up by taking out a UNC team that narrowly beat us earlier in the year, setting up a rematch with the team that gave us the worst beating of the season, UConn. By this point, expectations had shifted dramatically. This team went from one that most expected to fall by the Sweet 16 to one that most expected to win the title.
Doomed by a terrible shooting night, both from the field and from the free throw line (gee... sound familiar?), UK fell to eventual champ UConn (and destroying what would likely be the only opportunity for my team to face my wife's alma mater, Butler, and inciting unprecedented levels of trash talking in our house), crushing the Big Blue Nation's dreams of hanging banner #8 for at least another year.
This team of avengers was full of amazing stories, and this already long post doesn't have the time/patience to detail them all, but given the title, we have to point out the transformation of Joshua "Jorts" Harrellson from also-ran who almost got kicked off the team to the glass cleaning, giant slaying, throwing balls through fools' chest, heart and soul of this program.
This transformation started with twitter, of all things. After a dominating performance in the Blue White game, Jorts was looking for a pat on the back from Cal (and a well deserved pat, IMO) that never came. Instead, he was banned from twitter and sentenced to crazy amounts of conditioning.
That punishment led us to the Final Four. Dropping pounds and getting in crazy shape allowed Josh to dominate lesser men in the paint and more than hold his own against better competition. It brought us the Denim-Drive offense, seeing him take guys off the dribble and work a BEAUTIFUL pick n' roll. He went from a guy who we could count on to clean the glass to a legit scoring option.
His underdog story struck a chord in the Bluegrass, resonating with a state that is an underdog itself, especially in the sports world. Kentucky is a special place. Our passion for the Wildcats comes from many places, but I believe our devotion, pride and support comes in large part because it is really the primary thing we have of which we can be excessively proud. We LOVE our Wildcats, and the success they have found. It's a program that doesn't settle for mediocrity. We don't hang participation banners. We hang Final Four and Championship banners. We are crazy. My wife, bless her heart, is from Tennessee, and despite my best efforts to teach and explain, is still perplexed by the rabid following of the millions of UK fans.
We follow our Wildcats because they give us something in which to believe. They give us a rallying point. They give us something that we can show to the world with pride. There are many, many things wrong or depressing or weird about our state. But when it comes to sports, we have our Wildcats, the greatest tradition in all of college basketball. Take practically any measure of success, and if UK is not #1, we're in the top 5. More wins than anyone, the second most national championships, highest program winning percentage, most NCAA tourney games, most All Americans, etc. Hit up the UK basketball wikipedia entry for "The List" and prepare to be wowed.
Simply put, we have the best program. Ever. Yes, there are black marks (numerous probation/violations, scandals, etc., though there are plenty of others with similar records), but top to bottom, no program beats the University of Kentucky men's basketball team. There are some close competitors, but we are the standard bearer.
It's really the only thing Kentucky can brag about, aside from horse racing and bourbon. The Commonwealth is an underdog, and Josh's story represents someone overcoming serious roadblocks on the way to success. This team that no one expected to make the Final Four did so in large part o the back of a perfect example of what we as Kentuckians value: dedication, hard work, commitment, doing the dirty work and persevering when things go bad.
So on behalf of a grateful Big Blue Nation, I want to thank and salute Josh and this entire team for bringing home a long overdue Final Four. It is your surprising success that makes us long for the fact that we narrowly missed out on another title, and that makes it so hard to overcome the loss to UConn. But we take great pride in what you did accomplish, and so unexpectedly. And when Midnight Madness rolls around and we celebrate your success, know that you made yourselves and all of us proud.
We hang Final Four banners. And we will hang yours with glowing pride and joy.
Wednesday, April 06, 2011
My Wife is Awesome.
Congrats are in order for my lovely wife, who was approved on Monday for full ordination as an elder in the Indiana Conference of the United Methodist Church. After a very long, strenuous and complicated 8 years, she has reached the final step in this process.
For those who don't know much about the UMC or ordination, one can sort of compare it to becoming a tenured professor or finishing your medical residency. Since June 2008, she has been a provisional elder (like a residency program), and in June of this year, at Annual Conference, she will be ordained.
It's a very long, tedious process full of paper writing, meetings, psychological evaluations, discernment, hard work and so much more. And now she's just about completed that process. I'm proud of her, and seeing her work through this process has been a great benefit to me as well as I continue to debate whether or not the UMC ordination process is where I'm headed.
In conclusion, i would like to repeat that my wife is awesome. Very proud of you, dear.
Peace...
For those who don't know much about the UMC or ordination, one can sort of compare it to becoming a tenured professor or finishing your medical residency. Since June 2008, she has been a provisional elder (like a residency program), and in June of this year, at Annual Conference, she will be ordained.
It's a very long, tedious process full of paper writing, meetings, psychological evaluations, discernment, hard work and so much more. And now she's just about completed that process. I'm proud of her, and seeing her work through this process has been a great benefit to me as well as I continue to debate whether or not the UMC ordination process is where I'm headed.
In conclusion, i would like to repeat that my wife is awesome. Very proud of you, dear.
Peace...
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Expanding the Big Tent (Further Thoughts)
In my last post, I wrote briefly about what Big Tent Christianity means to me. I'd like to expand a little bit on that post:
Big Tent Christianity is Kingdom, not kingdom, focused. It's not about denominations or territories or any of the other minor, petty differences that have kept churches from being the Church. It's about embracing the fact that the God we serve, the Christ we follow, the Spirit we seek, is bigger than any one of us, and not something we can cram into some simple package. None of us have a monopoly on Truth.
For example... I was raised in Baptist churches. I currently work at a United Methodist church, my wife is a UM pastor. I went to a UM seminary. So, I like to refer to my spiritual heritage as Methobaptist or Wesleyan Baptist. One of the primary threads of Baptist theology is the belief in believer's baptism, that is, baptism by choice of the person being baptized. They make the decision as to when/if they want to be baptized, whereas the UMC has long practiced infant baptism. Historically, this conflict over the theology of baptism has been something that has caused some drama/beef/etc. Big Tent Christianity embraces both approaches, acknowledging that each one is theologically sound and has merit. It doesn't just push ignore differences, but rather realizes that each position is one that is tied in sound theological thinking and application. Believer's baptism acknowledges our ability to choose and enables the believer to actually remember their baptism, which they can then reflect upon and draw strength from in trying times. Infant baptism rightfully acknowledges that God is active and present in our lives before we ever even realize it (prevenient grace). There's room under the big tent for both approaches, and in interacting, Baptists and Methodists find themselves strengthened and blessed by the foundation behind both approaches. We learn and grow from each other, and the fellowship created is a gift of God.
Now, my hopes and dreams for the future of the Church...
Well, they're big. I know that much. I see a Church that spends little time squabbling over petty doctrinal disputes and more time practicing the incarnation of Christ, being the hands and feet of God in the world. We will be vested in our communities, a voice for the voiceless and sharing hope with the hopeless. We stop chasing the next fad or trend and instead practice the art of pointing to Christ. Instead of trying to be cool, we try to be Christ. If we really want to make any impact in this world, then we need to stop investing all our time in fitting in, and instead spend our time reaching out. Despite the protestations of some talking heads and supposed figureheads of Christianity, the concept of social justice is inherently tied to the message of Jesus. The church, when it is being the Church, is dedicated to sharing the love of Jesus with those around her, and that takes many, many forms. It's feeding someone physically and pointing to the need to be fed spiritually. It is helping the poor and pointing them toward the richness of Christ. It is breaking the bonds of oppression and pointing those newly freed (and those doing the oppressing) toward the freedom found in Jesus Christ.
I'm prone to dreaming big. The way things are are NOT the way they have to be. If there is no hope for change, then there is no hope in Christ. The very message of Jesus Christ indicates that we can be changed and we can take part in the changing. We can't do it on our own, but we don't have to. We have an advocate, and we have each other. So if we're talking about our hopes and dreams, then we cheat ourselves when we don't dream big.
Peace...
Big Tent Christianity is Kingdom, not kingdom, focused. It's not about denominations or territories or any of the other minor, petty differences that have kept churches from being the Church. It's about embracing the fact that the God we serve, the Christ we follow, the Spirit we seek, is bigger than any one of us, and not something we can cram into some simple package. None of us have a monopoly on Truth.
For example... I was raised in Baptist churches. I currently work at a United Methodist church, my wife is a UM pastor. I went to a UM seminary. So, I like to refer to my spiritual heritage as Methobaptist or Wesleyan Baptist. One of the primary threads of Baptist theology is the belief in believer's baptism, that is, baptism by choice of the person being baptized. They make the decision as to when/if they want to be baptized, whereas the UMC has long practiced infant baptism. Historically, this conflict over the theology of baptism has been something that has caused some drama/beef/etc. Big Tent Christianity embraces both approaches, acknowledging that each one is theologically sound and has merit. It doesn't just push ignore differences, but rather realizes that each position is one that is tied in sound theological thinking and application. Believer's baptism acknowledges our ability to choose and enables the believer to actually remember their baptism, which they can then reflect upon and draw strength from in trying times. Infant baptism rightfully acknowledges that God is active and present in our lives before we ever even realize it (prevenient grace). There's room under the big tent for both approaches, and in interacting, Baptists and Methodists find themselves strengthened and blessed by the foundation behind both approaches. We learn and grow from each other, and the fellowship created is a gift of God.
Now, my hopes and dreams for the future of the Church...
Well, they're big. I know that much. I see a Church that spends little time squabbling over petty doctrinal disputes and more time practicing the incarnation of Christ, being the hands and feet of God in the world. We will be vested in our communities, a voice for the voiceless and sharing hope with the hopeless. We stop chasing the next fad or trend and instead practice the art of pointing to Christ. Instead of trying to be cool, we try to be Christ. If we really want to make any impact in this world, then we need to stop investing all our time in fitting in, and instead spend our time reaching out. Despite the protestations of some talking heads and supposed figureheads of Christianity, the concept of social justice is inherently tied to the message of Jesus. The church, when it is being the Church, is dedicated to sharing the love of Jesus with those around her, and that takes many, many forms. It's feeding someone physically and pointing to the need to be fed spiritually. It is helping the poor and pointing them toward the richness of Christ. It is breaking the bonds of oppression and pointing those newly freed (and those doing the oppressing) toward the freedom found in Jesus Christ.
I'm prone to dreaming big. The way things are are NOT the way they have to be. If there is no hope for change, then there is no hope in Christ. The very message of Jesus Christ indicates that we can be changed and we can take part in the changing. We can't do it on our own, but we don't have to. We have an advocate, and we have each other. So if we're talking about our hopes and dreams, then we cheat ourselves when we don't dream big.
Peace...
Big Tent Christianity - Part of Transforming Theology Synchroblog
I'm taking part in a massive blogging effort as part of the Transforming Theology project, where numerous bloggers post about the same subject. The stated purpose of this project was to take a look at the concept of "Big Tent Christianity." We were asked to answer the question "What does Big Tent Christianity mean to you?"
For my readers (all 2 of you) out there that didn't go to seminary or don't care much about the Church, you might want to skip this post. But in case you don't (and because I don't think I'm smart or well-versed enough to do otherwise), I'll try to write this post as simply as possible without using the handful of $5 theological terms I know.
In my mind the concept of Big Tent Christianity is simply this- Kingdom over kingdom. For far too long (or rather too often) too many churches (and even the Church?) have been focused on their own little kingdoms with a lowercase "k." Concerned with increasing membership and tithes, we've focused on getting people in the doors. Butts in pews. In many cases, we became very adept at this process. We streamlined ushering people into our churches, but then failed to help usher the Kingdom into their lives and our own lives.
We missed the bigger picture. The Kingdom with a capital "K," that being the Kingdom of God or Kingdom of Heaven referred to so often in scripture. A Kingdom marked by peace, compassion, love. A Kingdom drenched in resurrection. A Kingdom that isn't marred by petty squabbles over who sits in what pew or what church gets the most people to darken their doors, but rather a Kingdom that doesn't rest when it sees injustice or pain. A Kingdom that reaches out to the poor, the outcast, the marginalized. A Kingdom that isn't about deciding who is on the outside, but rather one that opens its doors and invests itself into into the lives of all it touches.
The Kingdom of God. Right here. Among us. Within us. For some reason I fail to grasp, God lets us take part in creating this Kingdom. We are active participants in God's continuing creation.We all get to take part in this Kingdom. We sit at court with an entirely different type of King than anything the world has ever seen.
The Church needs to move beyond its short-sighted view of kingdom and see the bigger picture. To see the Kingdom in all its wondrously weird beauty. To see it right here, among us.
Peace...
PS: I'll try to write more tomorrow going a little more in-depth and answering (or rather sharing my thoughts on) some of the other questions they asked us to examine, like what our hopes and dreams are for the Church and what it looks like in our context. I wanted to get this in ASAP because, well, it was due by 8/13. I'm late to the party, but I'm here now.
Monday, May 10, 2010
So... I'm contemplating (lightly, at the moment) UMC ordination
Yeah... not to betray my Baptist roots, but I am considering the possibility of going through the UMC ordination process. For those of you who don't know, it's a long (like 7-8 years minimum) ordeal. Assuming I get through, and assuming the UM system doesn't radically change in that time (which it might), it would mean a 99% guaranteed career. It would also mean that if I go down the elder track, I could be placed anywhere at any kind of church in a variety of positions: solo pastor, associate pastor, etc. I'm not sure I want that. Being the head pastor of a church is not my thing. I'd rather work with youth, college and/or young adults. The other option is the deacon track, but I'd have to find my own jobs (which is ultimately no different than now, and would prevent me from doing some of the things only elders can do), but it might give me the option to do things like college or youth ministry without the worry of where I would be placed.
Aside from the opening up of job prospects (I'd LOVE to be a college chaplain or campus minister, but it seems those jobs require ordination from a denomination more organized than my current Baptist ordination. I'd also enjoy working on the conference level to shape the youth/young adults branch of ministry), there are the other benefits- housing, pension, etc. I hate to sound so mercenary, but that's part of the deal, and a sizable part.
So right now, I'm weighing options and trying to discern what the right thing to do actually is. The process is LONG, so it wouldn't really impact my current job (don't worry, anyone from Mount Pleasant who reads this- it wouldn't be finished for many years). There's a great deal of paperwork, testing, meetings and writing that I would have to do. And I still have to determine which track to pursue, if any.
On an ideological level, I'm trying to determine if I can reconcile my own beliefs with those of the UMC. Theologically, I don't see a great deal of a problem (I realized in seminary that I was quite a Wesleyan Baptist), but polity-wise, I have more questions. I've talked with Jill about this, and am thinking about meeting with some other UMC people here in Indiana that I know who have similar jobs/passions as I do (other youth ministers, college ministers, conference people) and talking to them.
I'll keep you updated. Once I figure out what I'm thinking...
Peace.
Aside from the opening up of job prospects (I'd LOVE to be a college chaplain or campus minister, but it seems those jobs require ordination from a denomination more organized than my current Baptist ordination. I'd also enjoy working on the conference level to shape the youth/young adults branch of ministry), there are the other benefits- housing, pension, etc. I hate to sound so mercenary, but that's part of the deal, and a sizable part.
So right now, I'm weighing options and trying to discern what the right thing to do actually is. The process is LONG, so it wouldn't really impact my current job (don't worry, anyone from Mount Pleasant who reads this- it wouldn't be finished for many years). There's a great deal of paperwork, testing, meetings and writing that I would have to do. And I still have to determine which track to pursue, if any.
On an ideological level, I'm trying to determine if I can reconcile my own beliefs with those of the UMC. Theologically, I don't see a great deal of a problem (I realized in seminary that I was quite a Wesleyan Baptist), but polity-wise, I have more questions. I've talked with Jill about this, and am thinking about meeting with some other UMC people here in Indiana that I know who have similar jobs/passions as I do (other youth ministers, college ministers, conference people) and talking to them.
I'll keep you updated. Once I figure out what I'm thinking...
Peace.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
I love it when people from a church act like the Church
Had a guy and his son from Jill's church, Memorial UMC here in Terre Haute, who came over this evening and mowed our ridiculously out of control lawn. Our mower is broken/nonfunctional, or I would have done it myself.
They came over, mowed the yard, weed-eated part of it (I did the other part), swept up the clipping and hauled them off. And wouldn't take anything for their time and labor.
See, people like these two are what continue to fuel my faith that we, as humans, aren't completely screwed up. They reinforce my belief that the church can some day ascribe to be The Church, the living body of Christ in this world.
They came over, mowed the yard, weed-eated part of it (I did the other part), swept up the clipping and hauled them off. And wouldn't take anything for their time and labor.
See, people like these two are what continue to fuel my faith that we, as humans, aren't completely screwed up. They reinforce my belief that the church can some day ascribe to be The Church, the living body of Christ in this world.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
I had an idea for a blog post...
But I lost it. Hate it when that happens. I've had several ideas that have come to me during these last 4 months, but when I get to a computer with the time to write, they disappear. Need to work on finding ways to capture ideas when they happen.
Maybe they will come back some day.
Maybe they will come back some day.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Merry Christmas!
1In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. 2(This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) 3And everyone went to his own town to register.
4So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. 5He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. 6While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, 7and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.
8And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. 9An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. 10But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. 11Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ[a] the Lord. 12This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger." 13Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,
14"Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."
14"Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."
15When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, "Let's go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about."
16So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. 17When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, 18and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. 19But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. 20The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.
Luke 1:1-20
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